Places to Sleep

When you sleep eighteen to twenty hours a day, it's pretty important to have your bedding choices nailed down. I happen to know a couple of dogs that live in the back yard, and they lie around in the dirt, or on cold, hard bricks, or damp and smelly nasty old dog beds, and that just isn't going to cut the mustard for this little bulldog.

No siree.


What I have managed to throw together is

1. My own leather arm chair.

2. My own sweet and freshly laundered dog bed, next to item #1 above.

3. My own large and deeply cushioned espresso-colored leather sofa. (This, I admit, I have to share with THE WOMAN and THE MAN and sometimes with THE GIRL. But late at night this baby is all mine.)

4. A recent addition, THE GIRL'S bed.


5. The bed THE MAN and THE WOMAN sleep in is off-limits. This is a bone of contention. Not between them, but between me and them.



Item #1, the leather chair, is mostly for serious do-not-fuck-with-me sleep. Esp. if I have my back to the room or my face tucked between my paws and scrunched into the seat cushion. I prefer to wake up in the morning in this chair as it affords the best view into the kitchen and lets me know immediately what's going on in there. The chair is also very low-slung, which is perfect for me when I'm really sleepy and don't have the energy to engage in a serious climb.

The only real draw-back to the chair is that THE GIRL will kick me out of it if THE MAN and THE WOMAN are on the sofa. THE GIRL is merciless and cruel in this regard and will brook no opposition. I then must either try to finagle a spot on the sofa between THE MAN and THE WOMAN, or I have to opt for my own bed. Which I settle into with a grumpy demeanor.

And then quickly fall asleep.


Item the second, my own bed, is mostly for lying in while I chew things. My chew toy sometimes, but my own self mostly. The bed is small and snug and not at all slippery, so I can really root around and snuffle and lick and rub and chew and lick and chew and chew and chew and chew.

And then nap.

Also it is good as a rest spot if I am tired from hard-core sleeping on the leather chair. I can hop down from there, settle into the bed, and take a little light nap to take the edge off.

Oh, and in the afternoon a little patch of sunlight falls on it and this is good for afternoon nappies.


Item #3, the sofa, is mostly for getting pet, esp. in the evening when THE MAN comes home from work and watches television. THE WOMAN sits and watches television, too, but she prefers to knit, which reduces her usefulness to me as her hands are occupied. Luckily, THE MAN doesn't have any hobbies that interfere with petting.

But occasionally the sofa is really, really good for late night deep sleep that involves hiding. I am mostly the same color as the sofa, and if I get in between the cushions I can settle down and be damn near invisible. It looks like somebody left a white sock on the sofa is all.

From time to time I'll also sleep on the ottoman. This is the "Hot-dog" or "Sausage" Nap. Front and rear legs tucked under, head down and straight forward. This kind of napping requires a certain Zen state of mind and is not intended for the novice sleeper as any movement at all will disrupt the nap and result in severe grumpiness.

As far as the fourth option, THE GIRL'S bed, I'm not going to say.


Some things are privrate.


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Fin.

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